Multifandom Potato

1.5M ratings
277k ratings

See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna

Hi guys! I opened 5 slots for commissions through Ko-Fi and I’m offering a 50% sale off everything until 21/06/23 or until the slots close.
I will very much appreciate reshares as I haven’t had any income in over a year (startups man! startups!) and I’m dangerously close to not making rent for the next month
;D

The sales code is : BROTHEBROS50OFF
you just have to chose what commission tier fits your needs (if something isn’t listed feel free to contact me) and then after you put the code in the checkout it should be 50% off

I will NOT draw: sexual scenes and full nudity, furries and mechas

I have the right to refuse (and refund) a commission if the subject contradicts my core beliefs (eg, will NEVER accept to draw anything racist or slander of a real person)

Pinned Post bro arts bro's commissions art commission info
whatkindofnameisvolta
viridianriver

KOKOBOT - The Airbnb-Owned Tech Startup - Data Mining Tumblr Users' Mental Health Crises for "Content"

image

I got this message from a bot, and honestly? If I was a bit younger and not such a jaded bitch with a career in tech, I might have given it an honest try. I spent plenty of time in a tough situation without access to any mental health resources as a teen, and would have been sucked right in.

Chatting right from your phone, and being connected with people who can help you? Sounds nice. Especially if you believe the testimonials they spam you with (tw suicide / self harm mention in below images)

image
image

But I was getting a weird feeling, so I went to read the legalese.

I couldn't even get through the fine-print it asked me to read and agree to, without it spamming the hell out of me. Almost like they expect people to just hit Yes? But I'm glad I stopped to read, because:

image
  • What you say on there won't be confidential. (And for context, I tried it out and the things people were looking for help with? I didn't even feel comfortable sharing here as examples, it was all so deeply personal and painful)
image
  • Also, what you say on there? Is now...
  • Koko's intellectual property - giving them the right to use it in any way they see fit, including
  • Publicly performing or displaying your "content" (also known as your mental health crisis) in any media format and in any media channel without limitation
  • Do this indefinitely after you end your account with them
  • Sell / share this "content" with other businesses
image
image
  • Any harm you come to using Koko? That's on you.
  • And Koko won't take responsibility for anything someone says to you on there (which is bleak when people are using it to spread Christianity to people in crisis)

I was curious about their business model. They're a venture-capitol based tech startup, owned by Airbnb, the famous mental health professionals with a focus on ethical business practices./s They're also begging for donations despite having already been given 2.5 million dollars in research funding. (If you want a deep dive on why people throw crazy money at tech startups, see my other post here)

image
image
image

They also use the data they gather from users to conduct research and publish papers. I didn't find them too interesting - other than as a good case study of "People tend to find what they are financially incentivized to find". Predictably, Koko found that Kokobot was beneficial to its users.

So yeah, being a dumbass with too much curiosity, I decided to use the Airbnb-owned Data-Mining Mental Health Chatline anyway. And if you thought it was dangerous sounding from the disclaimers? Somehow it got worse.

(trigger warning / discussions of child abuse / sexual abuse / suicide / violence below the cut - please don't read if you're not in a good place to hear about negligence around pretty horrific topics.)

Keep reading

auressea
thatsmimi

Kokobot is incredibly predatory and exploitative. I wrote a post about how it exploits minors' empathy and gamifies "giving mental health advice", resulting in an unregulated mess that can only do harm to teens' mental health in the long run.

There are young people on tumblr that actively seek support from KokoBot right now, if you check the tag for recent posts. Those people did not get paid to promote it, so do not harrass them. If you can, direct them towards resources about Kokobot (like this post) that are more transparent about what this company is up to.

dduane

This... is DEEPLY DISTURBING.

wilwheaton

SIGNAL.
BOOST.

yikes stay safe yall
noir-renard
elviraaxen

image
image
image
image
image
image
image

I made this a long time ago but for some reason never posted! It is my quick guide to protecting yourself against burnout as a person with ADHD and ASD.

Of course it is all about meeting your support needs at the end of the day, which are completely individual and may vary over time, but this could function as a guide if you have a hard time figuring out where to start! 🫶🏻 💙💙💙

i felt that op ever since i stopped masking all the time i have so much more energy to do stuff also cushioning works wonders
cassandrasdreamworlds
cassandrasdreamworlds

i am SO sorry i saw this so late lmao but @violaceum-vitellina-viridis tagged me in a self promo tag game! (which they stole from @inexplicifics apparently xD)

to encourage some self promo, how about sharing your top fics no matter how big or small - give us the links to your wonderful words with the Most hits/Most kudos/Most comments/Most bookmarks /Most words/Least words

I already know which fic is gonna come out on top regardless of category xD which means i will just leave out the top fic in the following categories so i dont slap in the link for my big fic 5 times in a row lmao

MOST HITS: very unsurprising but also still surprising because I never thought it would get that big but it's my fic from every height I’d fall I’d call a DC|Batfam fic with fucked up time wibbly wobbly reincarnation and slow build

MOST KUDOS: VERY surprising because i basically never check my stats page and didnt notice this fic sneake itself that high (except yknow. every height) but its bathroom break or a statistically unlikely number of kids stacked into a bathroom which is my DC|Batkids comedy crack fic and a take on the Wayne GalaTM trope

MOST COMMENTS: ... huh well I do get a decent amount of comments tbh but this one did surprise me a lot. it's (after every height) i’ll scream, but you won’t hear - ‘forget me not’  which is the third part in a series featuring an amnesiac Witcher AU - as in yes most of the characters forgot Jaskier the Bard as ever existed. it is VERY angst and mind the tags but i have since abandoned the series, though the first part can be read with reading the series if you dont mind a sad ending

MOST BOOKMARKS: in first... AFTER every height and bathroom break are at the moment two fics tied at 149 bookmarks
the first one is in wonderment, at you and yours which is a Witcher fic with Geralt/Jaskier, 6k words of smut and strength kink
the second is dragonology a DC|Batfam fic where Tim after getting injured and his body going "nope ive had enough" finds out that he's actually a dragon shifter

MOST WORDS: i don't think i can actually get around explicitly mentioning every height here since it is my longest fic and getting longer with atm 60k, second in line is we'll all be the weak and the weary sometime a rare pair Witcher fic with Regis/Roche - yes the vampire Regis and yes Vernon Roche of the Blue Stripes from TW2 and TW3, it's got 17k and is a short developing relationship fic and with the best meet ugly ive written so far

LEAST WORDS: .................................. do I. do I have to. really? ughhhhhh okay I'll link it if ONLY for baby Cas who was very proud of it - anyway comfort a Yuri on Ice fluff Yuuri/Viktor piece that I wrote when I was like. what? 16? pls keep that in mind if you do read it but my advice is. don't xDDD


tagging: @brothebro @childoffantasy @1flyingcat @ironhoshi @itsfirecat @howdidthisevenhappenanyway @bard-llama and anyone else who wants to spread some self promo around!

fic recs :3 cas' fics are awesome
stealingyourbones
stealingyourbones

I am positively feral of the idea that John Constantine is an ex of both Maddie and Jack Fenton. Imagine the possibilities. They’re endless.

millylotus

It was a moment in college probably, so like imagine Vlad's accident happens & his partners are like super distraught & don't think they'll ever enjoy the supernatural again b/c of what happened to him. Then John freaking Constantine rocks up into their life re-ignites their love for the supernatural than just fucking dips like he was never there. The only thing they have left of him are pictures [even better if they're all kinda fucked up cause magic] & Jazz who is either John's goddaughter or John is her bio dad.

Of course when Vlad finds out he's fucking furious cause his partners replaced him with a random fucking drunk. Vlad can't even get back at John cause the fucker has demonic protection or some shit.

bjurnberg

Vlad going after Danny and ignoring Jazz because she’s Constantine’s daughter tracks.

John being Jazz’s bio dad makes a lot more sense for the color schemes too - John is blond, so Maddie’s red hair is more likely to be inherited than Jack’s black. She got John’s eyes, body type, and wild luck. (I mean, how else would she survive this long in the Fenton house without some major accident befalling her? Danny sure didn’t come out unscathed. He only lived to 14 because Jazz was watching his back. The second he was unsupervised he got himself killed on a dare.)

Jazz asked about this after the middle school bio class that teaches about dominant and recessive genes through Mendel’s pea flower experiments. Jack and Maddie were open and clear about their relationship with John in college. Said that he was fun and intelligent about ghosts and the occult (they went on a rant about ghosts until Jazz brought the topic back around) and then he left the relationship on good terms, moving back to England to play in some band. Cell phones hadn’t been invented yet so keeping in contact was hard since he moved a lot, but they sent him a letter with Jazz’s baby pictures.

“He’s the one who mailed you that stuffed bear you like so much!” Maddie added before getting distracted again by a tool she’d been tinkering with during the conversation.

“So you’re not my dad?” 12 year old Jazz looked up at Jack with watery eyes.

“Oh course I’m your dad, Jazzy-pants!! Just because we don’t share DNA doesn’t mean I’m not your dad!! I love you more than anything in this world AND the next!! I’d fight every ghost there is for you!!”

Jack fake-punched at the air around Jazz’s head which made her giggle a little, and everything was fine. She loved her parents and her little brother. Even if they were weird.



It wasn’t until years later when she was dragging Danny’s bloody and unconscious body out of the basement lab, trying to think of any safe place they could go, that she considered contacting her bio dad.

stealingyourbones

If jazz is John’s kid… John’s has a whole thing where he has demons blood. Does that have any adverse effects?

the-witchhunter

Demon blood enhances healing with non fatal wounds healing fairly quickly, but is corrosive to many materials INCLUDING HUMAN FLESH AND IS DANGEROUS IF INJESTED LEADING TO POTENTIAL DEATH if the person in contact with the blood doesn’t share the demonic taint from the same source

The big one is, unless magically protected, it allows the Demon to find the host anywhere

If this is a younger john as her father, then it wouldn’t be his current demonic taint

It would be Nergal’s blood. 

Nergal, for those who don’t know, it an ancient babylonian god turned demon and one of John’s most persistent and powerful enemies, and, after leaving the weird obscuring field of Amity Park, he knows where John’s daughter is

halfblackwolfdemon

image

Oh fuck

phantom-things

BUT, But Danny is the Ghost king. Assumidly Danny would put a protection pact on his sister

Nergal senses that and while really wanting revenge right away promptly realizes he should wait until the ghost king isn't right there next to her

bjurnberg

Okay okay okay I love this. And I propose:

Jazz does have Danny’s protection, which is why she was safe going out of town to tour a couple colleges for the weekend - Danny got caught by their parents while she was gone. She comes home to ✨trauma✨ and escapes with her brother while Maddie and Jack are out hunting another ghost sighting. (Box Ghost in the City Hall archives.)

She decides to go back to the dorms at Gotham University. They’re mostly empty right now and can make a good hiding place while she figures out how to track down some crazy British occult musician.

Nergal feels her leave Amity again, but this time he can sense the one who protects her is weak. Maybe weak enough to defeat. He catches up with them just as they enter Gotham.

Supernatural powerhouses are something Batman actively tries to keep out of his town. He shows up just after Nergal gets his ass handed to him by what sounds like a Black Canary scream dialed up to 1000.

“What is going on?!” he growls at a red haired young woman who is standing over an unconscious teenager.

Those nearly-teal blue eyes look unsettlingly familiar as she stands firm, squaring her shoulders, and says,

“Doesn’t matter. It’s taken care of. But maybe you can help us. Everyone says you’re a great detective. I need to find my birth father right away.”

“Hire a P.I.”

“I don’t have that much time or money. I don’t even know if he’s still alive. Please, it’s urgent.”

Batman figures if he plays along and gives the kid something she wants, she’ll be more willing to answer his questions. Finding someone on the Batcomputer is usually simple enough.

“What’s his name?”

“John Constantine.”

Well shit. Now he doesn’t even want his questions answered.

lolottes

in my opinion the teddy bear is not an ordinary plush, Constantine must have stashed a protection there or something to contact him. Which is why even before the Fentons were in Amityville, Jazz had a safety net. It's also the reason why the baddest things don't go to the Phantom Zone and then take the portal to earth, it kind of blurs the signal. only natives of the area can cross it, first after finding it by chance and then following rumors. This is also why it takes so long for elders to present, they don't really communicate with weaker beings.

bjurnberg

Ooooohhhh I love BearBert being a plot point!! Genius. Thank you.

evilminji

Okay but? Would that mean Nergal gets his ass concussed by a teddy bear? Danny is NOT in a good way. That scream, while HUMAN impressive... would not be DEMON impressive. More of a weak, raspy, laying in a pool of your own blood trying to threaten the guy with the knife, sorta of attack then the Curb Stomp it usually is. A hard shove at best.

Does it take out a wall? Absolutely. But cheap plaster and drywall aren't exactly "demon sturdy". And frankly? Jazz is panicking. The creep stick did diddly. That F*cker ATE her cat-o-nines. She's the only thing between he baby brother and a Second Death. And??

Something in the back of her head, some part of her that's been with her since birth. That's been riding the waves of Fate in its little boat, forever casually observing, sometimes calling out the best odds and favorable paths. That little voice PLUNGES in and grabs her by the neck. Screams to listen and listen well.

USE. THE FUCKIN'. BEAR!

And she's swinging BearBert at the terrible Not-A-Ghost's head with all her liminal enhanced strength.

It hits like a hammer on a gong. A smith, bringing down the fury on glowing steel. Sparks and weight and WHAM(!!!).

Because? Constantine... used to care more. And part of him still does.

He was younger. Less worn down. Less people he cared about and knew, dead at his feet. Less innocent people lost to terrible things he couldn't stop or find in time. Less monster plaguing his dreams. His waking hours. HE was... more back then. Less back then. He was still pretending he could maybe, sorta, someday be a father figure. Be... be SOMEBODY in his kid's life.

But she's safer where she is. And life has shown he's not safe to be around. His kiddo deserves a normal life, yeah?

But! He WORRIED. Still worries. So he sent this ugly little teddy bear he spent AGES tracking down, cause it's apparently her FAVORITE Ever and she wanted one. And her put... f*ck, what DIDN'T he shove inside that thing? He called in FAVORS. Used items he'd saved for most of his life. Hunted down things he wasn't even sure were REAL.

Made it so he could add more, no matter WHERE he was.

And he did. Found a new spell? Add it to the bear. Gotta wait in this sh*t dinner for a few hours for a contact? Meh, layer a few extra spells and send um to the bear. Have a beer. League meeting taking too long? Doodle up some new uses for alien whatever of the month, figure out how to turn it into a protection magic... aaaand send it to the bear.

Man needs a hobby. Sue him. It... it makes him feel better. Like he's THERE for his kid. Looking out for her. Making sure she gets to have a nice, boring life. Study something interesting but average. Hopefully NOT follow her Mum into poking at the dead.

But! As much as we like to rag on John "trainwreck" Constantine? The main is a BEAST when he actually feels he HAS to be? And for all Jazz may have PUNTED Nergal through a wall and down two floors with a teddybear? He would eventually shake that off. Be Not Best Pleased.

Try to come BACK and go for round two.

But WAIT! "What's the POINT, I hear you ask, of a Protective Teddybear, if I? The creator, DON'T KNOW that it's being Put To Use??? An EXCELLENT point! Says John "Hell Hath No Fury" Constantine, as he arrives alright with impossible Smiting Wrath dripping from his form and enough magic on his person to fist fight God. That WOULD be silly. Thank goodness he didn't do anything like THAT!

Now! Grit your teeth if you don't plan to lose um', Nergal. This WILL hurt and he's not even Vaguely sorry about it. Fuck with HIS kid, will you?

@stealingyourbones @bjurnberg

queerfandommiscellany

It's habit, more than anything, that has John Constantine prodding at the bear when he's bored like it's a sore tooth.

It's been years. His daughter is grown, probably going off to college any day now, assuming she didn't die of an untimely illness or something. Even on the off-chance she's SURVIVED this long with a connection to him, the girl might not even HAVE the stupid bear anymore.

And then he's sitting in the House of Mysteries one day, squinting at this stupid book, so bored he can barely manage to see the words, and- well, he checks on the bear.

It's not his kid. He's not keeping tabs on the stupid brat he bleeding well abandoned. It's not because he cares about the kid, it's just... it's just an interesting exercise, seeing how many spells and defenses and warnings he can layer onto this completely mundane children's toy at once. Academic, really. And he's bored.

The bear is fine. As always. Good.

So John drags his attention back to the book and turns to another page, scrawling a barely-legible note onto his pad--

And two decades of paranoid spellwork crash over him all at once.

John doesn't even take a moment to think about how bad an idea this is before he's up and moving.

knifecatanthology

Nobody knows Constantine has a daughter, but it is known that somewhere out there exists a teddy bear equipt to Smite God. Why? Let's say the House of Mystery keeps an auto-updating list of the most powerful mystic weaponry, ranked by strength. They're listed by name, of course, so if you don't know what the thing is, the list's not too helpful, but it exists.

Someone does something, yada yada evil plan, except hey, they're using some weird mystic item to do it, and oh okay they've disappeared we-know-not-where so let's try to figure this out. JLD gets called in, nobody recognizes the item described, someone suggests checking through texts in the House of Mystery, and then Captain Marvel perks up and is like oh yeah! we should check the Big List of Mystic Weapons! And everyone is like the *w h a t* bc nobody's ever even heard of that but Marvel gets occasional Random Magic Knowledge since he's the Champion.

So after a bit of mucking about, Constantine manages to summon The List, and everyone gathers around to check it over. They're like damn it's just names, but then Flash is like hey uh what the hell is number 7. Entry number 7 on The List is something called "Bearbert the Steadfast". John stops breathing for a moment, because surely not, but nobody notices since Marvel's just poked at The List and hey would you look at that, a little description box.

7. Bearbert the Steadfast

~~ A teddy bear, enchanted to protect its charge from any dangers they may encounter ~~

There's a brief pause before people start talking over each other, loudest of all an incredulous cry of "A teddy bear ?". John is having trouble breathing again, because holy shit he knew he'd put a lot of work into making that thing strong but he didn't realize just how successful he was. And over the commotion he hears a quiet hum from Marvel, who's standing next to him because John's been holding The List this whole time. So Marvel kind of hums, then softly says "The description's incomplete." And carefully doesn't look at John's face as he reaches over and lightly pokes at the description, which flickers and.

7. Bearbert the Steadfast

~~ A teddy bear, enchanted to protect its charge from any dangers they may encounter. Someone's father loves them very much. ~~

ashfly

And then the inscription changes

1. Sir Bearbert The Unyielding
~~The only remaining connection between two connected by blood, enspelled to ensure the charges survival from the dangers they encounters. Someone's father loves them very much. For the protection already given, the King of the End granted knighthood - and a semblance of life. sometimes the younger sibling looks after the older, alright? I love you, stay alive-~~

fantasticbluebirdfan

Do your telling me THAT NOT ONLY FOES THE DESCRIPTION BASICALLY IMPLY IF NOT OUT RIGHT SNITCHES JHONS LOVE FOR HIS DAUGHTER BEARBERT BADICLY EVENTUALLY GAINS SENTIENCE AFTER SPENDING TIME NEXT TO ECTO BUT WHAT IF THE KNOGHT PART COMES FOR A TIME WHEN DANNY AND JAZZ WHERE MEESING AROUND AFTER HE WAS GHOST KING AND HE SAID - I now doub thee Bearbert protector of jazz I king danny task you to protect her -

Jazz- Danny I don't need protection I'm older than you

Danny- yeah but sometimes it's the younger sibling looks after the older alright?*and if he worries she'll also die like he did in that house and puts a lil ecto to at least make the bear contaminated enough to hit ghost in a last ditch effort and to purify the ecto and air around it thanks frostbite for that tidbit it's because he worries* I love you stay alive is whispered

azulhood

John would very much like to know how his kid got the now sentient bear knighted. (He is totally not stressing out about her knowing a king and how big of a target that puts on her back, why would you ever think that?)

John adds more protections to the bear, not cos he's worried of course not, knights need that protection you know,

darkinufan
nerdpoe

Danny has an Ice Core.

He isn't aware of it, but this does, in fact, greatly influence how his ghost form looks as he grows up.

His appearance starts getting more rugged, eyes a paler, more piercing green, hair a bit more uncontrollable and wild.

He packs muscle easily, even in human form.

When in ghost form, he has an aura of something patient and dangerous, and that sense only grows the older he gets.

Basically, our boy starts to look like a viking.

No matter how goofy and bumbling he really is, his first impression is always a horrifying moment for whoever is meeting him.

And as his ghost form grows with his human form, he outgrows his hazmat outfit. Frostbite and the Far Frozen fashion him some new clothes-which only compliment and play off of the viking aesthetic he's got going on.

And with the height he inherited from his father?

Our man is a very, very intimidating figure to look at. More so than Dan; because while Dan was dangerous and scary, he was all energy and lightning and rage.

Adult Danny comes across as lethal and terrifying, all ice and persistence and that final, terrible silence before you realize you've already died.

Dan felt like the warrior in front of you. Danny feels like the wilderness in winter, vast and unforgiving.

Anyways, when a summoning for Klarion goes horribly wrong and Danny gets called instead, the Justice League has a moment where they're convinced they've summoned something much, much worse than Klarion.

And Danny, standing there completely confused, is not helping by remaining silent and still while staring John Constantine in the eye.

Good news, the bad guys are also very concerned about the weird ghost viking and are actually moving to stand side by side with the Justice League on this.

Bad news, who the fuck is this guy?

"...Fuck," is all Constantine whispers, backing away slowly.

@simplestoryteller

nerdpoe

I couldn't stop thinking about it. I had to write how Danny comes off as to others. Playlist I actually listened to while describing him forgive me i went too far and what Danny's actual personality is

nerdpoe

nerdpoe:

Danny has an Ice Core.

He isn't aware of it, but this does, in fact, greatly influence how his ghost form looks as he grows up.

His appearance starts getting more rugged, eyes a paler, more piercing green, hair a bit more uncontrollable and wild.

He packs muscle easily, even in human form.

When in ghost form, he has an aura of something patient and dangerous, and that sense only grows the older he gets.

Basically, our boy starts to look like a viking.

No matter how goofy and bumbling he really is, his first impression is always a horrifying moment for whoever is meeting him.

And as his ghost form grows with his human form, he outgrows his hazmat outfit. Frostbite and the Far Frozen fashion him some new clothes-which only compliment and play off of the viking aesthetic he's got going on.

And with the height he inherited from his father?

Our man is a very, very intimidating figure to look at. More so than Dan; because while Dan was dangerous and scary, he was all energy and lightning and rage.

Adult Danny comes across as lethal and terrifying, all ice and persistence and that final, terrible silence before you realize you've already died.

Dan felt like the warrior in front of you. Danny feels like the wilderness in winter, vast and unforgiving.

Anyways, when a summoning for Klarion goes horribly wrong and Danny gets called instead, the Justice League has a moment where they're convinced they've summoned something much, much worse than Klarion.

And Danny, standing there completely confused, is not helping by remaining silent and still while staring John Constantine in the eye.

Good news, the bad guys are also very concerned about the weird ghost viking and are actually moving to stand side by side with the Justice League on this.

Bad news, who the fuck is this guy?

"...Fuck," is all Constantine whispers, backing away slowly.

@simplestoryteller

I FOUND THE BITCH

I FOUND THE HALF REMEMBERED ART THAT PLANTED THE SEED FOR THIS

I WAS SO EXCITED I FORGOT I COULD HYPERLINK

The summoning ritual was finished, and John braced himself for Klarion's imminent arrival. Bruce could only hope that what the mage had to offer would be considered valuable enough for the chaos demon's assistance.

But something was off.

Instead of the burst of hot air that so often heralded Klarion's arrival, there was a silent rush of cold.

And someone much more intimidating stepped through.

The man's hair was white, his eyes were a pale, glowing, piercing green, and his skin was as pale as the snow that had started to fall. Taller than Superman, quieter than Batman.

He wore a furred mantle that bore no resemblance to any animal Bruce knew of. His hair was braided out of his face, his armor bore shimmering Ancient Nordic designs that were so old, Bruce couldn't find a single rune he knew.

Hovering above the man's head was a crown of solid, glittering ice. It sloped and spiked, and every movement shook snow from it's small peaks. Above that, hovering between reality and a dream, a miniature Aurora Borealis flickered in and out of view.

The crown was less a crown and more a small group of mountains, plucked from Norway and shrunk into something befitting the being in front of them.

Looking upon him forced Bruce to confront his own mortality, because this entity was dripping with lethality. Not the type he was used to, not the kind that could be met with the cold steel of a blade or the sudden, numbing hot-cold pain of a bullet.

The kind of mortality that he feared.

The quiet death in the wilds; alone, hungry, and scared.

Staring at the being that had been summoned, Bruce was struck with the feeling that he was watching a wolf as it observed him. Patient. Cold.

Knowing that no matter what it did, it was going to get a free meal if it only took a day or two to wait.

Bruce was broken from that silent, obtrusive knowledge when the entity looked away from him, eyes searching the battlefield.

Then the being took a silent step forward, ice tendrils branching out from where he stepped, his eyes having entirely fixated on the Mage that had summoned him.

The cultists that had been working for Nergal slowly turned and started standing in line with the Justice League, prepared to defend against...this.

Whatever this was.

Constantine backed away slowly, swearing under his breath and shaking.

The entity looked towards the cultists, letting out a small, disdainful hum.

As one, the cultists bolted, leaving behind their tools and sacrifices to summon their false god.

The Justice League, far too preoccupied with whatever was in front of them, couldn't do much to stop them.

The being took a deep breath and sighed through his nose, causing a gust of wind cold enough to make Bruce's skin sting.

"Well, this is awkward," the being sighed, rubbing the back of his neck, "Uh...did you guys need me for something? I was kind of in the middle of hiding from the Observants."

Bruce's brain paused. Rewound.

Restarted.

Assessed.

Oh God this was another Clark; frightening stature, polite, down to earth nature.

"I'm sorry, hiding from the who?" Bruce heart himself ask faintly, as he forced his body to understand that he wasn't in any present danger from the...person in front of him. The man turned his attention from the wheezing magician and back on Bruce.

"Kinda like a council, super annoying, keep trying to make me do paperwork."

"I...see. We were actually trying to reach Klarion, is he unavailable?"

The man sucked in air through his teeth and rested his hands on his hips, scuffing one of his shoes on the ground.

"Oof, yeah; Klarions a little bit in Time Prison right now. Genuinely didn't think anyone wanted to willingly deal with him, or I woulda sent you guys like, a note or something. Want me to just do what you were gonna have him do?"

Constantine stared at Bruce with wide, terrified eyes and shook his head.

Bruce considered it.

"What price would you have? We wanted the cultists captured and their artifacts broken."

Constantine graduated to desperately crossing his arms in an "X". Superman was looking at Bruce like he was insane. Bruce ignored them.

"Uh...my little sister is actually a huge Static Shock fan. Any chance of an autograph?"

"I can arrange that."

@simplestoryteller

angryricepudding

This is so awesome I wanted to draw him! Ignore the lighting lol

image
fadinggalaxysalad

If you scan the reblogs and there’s a trip down Thirsty Constantine Highway (because Highway To Hell) and if he came out looking like this? I do not blame him in the least.

angryricepudding

Had to do it,, based off of charlietheepic7's comment💖

image
image
image
image
hdgnj

I love it! The little blush is so cute!

Poor John and his thirsty Bisexual heart.

Danny is of course oblivious. He he no idea. Really channelling the Fenton himbo gene. Big dense sweetheart!d

John isn't sure he can handle it 😂😂😂